Discover firsthand the untold tale of Saint Patrick as Team Sawrite take you through an average day in the life of the bhoy himself, as well as detailing the intricacies behind the St. Paddy's day celebrations in Ireland!
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lyrics
Hi, thanks for coming in. Please, take a seat.
Alright, on the seat or on the floor?
Um, the seat would probably be comfier- can I get you a drink?
No it's alright I've got my own.
Ah okay, okay, well I'm Gary, part owner of Team Sawrite, it's nice to meet you. So, please, in your own words, why should Team Sawrite incorporate your country's holiday "Saint Patrick's Day" into our second studio album, which will feature a song for each month's biggest holiday, biggest event, as opposed to, say, I don't know, bank holiday Monday? What makes Saint Patrick's Day better?
Right, so..
Saint, Patrick was a man
Who had himself a plan
To rid Ireland of all its snakes.
He grabbed them with his hands
And threw them in the van
And drove it into the lake.
All for the best
The plan was a success
The snakes all drowned without a sound.
The snakes were all dead in the lake
And so we chose to celebrate
By wearing green clothes and getting fucked.
Could you elaborate on the snakes? Were they metaphorical or are we talking ectothermic, amniote vertebrates?
Aye that's right.
No I meant, it had to be one surely.
Aye that's right.
It can't be both.. I mean-
Yes.
No, I-
It doesn't matter, the important part is..
He invented the colour green
He saw it on the grass and said
Wouldn't you look at that.
It was the colour of his snake genocide machine
He wore a green hat,
And green socks.
He sported a minty green condom
And the chikas loved the mintiness
Of the green condom, that he donned on,
His. Massive. Penis.
Paddy was a noble man
A pot of gold of a man
He valued his missus
More than a Guinness.
He mastered every part of life,
Even basketball
And we celebrate his life today so..
We drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink in the pub.
We drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink until we're drunk!
And then
We drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink in the street.
We drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink until we're fucked!
Okay, so, as I understand, you can drink in the street because of saint Patrick?
Yep.
but you were already doing This?
Yep.
You say he had a van?
Yep
in the 7th century?
Yes.
Where did we find this guy?
Anyway
Paddy was Irish Santa Clause
He gave us the best gift of all.
He changed the law
So now we can drink our bottles at dawn
And drink while we mow the lawn.
If it wasn't for saint Patrick
Drinking on the street today would be illegal.
Today would be just another day
Of drinking in the street illegally.
Paddy ain't afraid to punch
Paganism in the face
And order a Guinness
From the dodgy part of town.
He knew something that the
Rest of us couldn't understand
Shame I couldn't understand it to explain it..
I don't know what St Patrick did
But I gather that you celebrate
By knocking back some drinks,
And sporting
something green,
and that's just fine by me
So you find a street and have a pint
or you have three.
Can you paint the picture of that night?
What's it like?
Is it great? Or is it fucking shite?
We drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink in the pub.
We drink, and drink, and drink, and…
So, just so we're all on the same page..
Patrick uses shamrock in an illustrative parable (We got pished)
Patrick banishes all snakes from Ireland (We got fucked)
Patrick's walking stick grows into a living tree? (We got wankered)
Patrick speaks with ancient Irish ancestors, I don't know, why not
(We consumed copious quantities of high proof alcohol)
We drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink in the pub.
We drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink until we're drunk!
And then
We drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink in the street.
We drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink until we're fucked!
We drink, and drink, and drink, until the kids want to go home
We drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink when we get home.
We drink in our bed. We drink in our dreams.
We wake up and drink the entire next day-
ENOUGH! Get out the office, get out of my hair, just get out! I don't believe a god-damned word! Leave the bottle there don't touch it just get out now!
Alright, alright, I'll go, I'll go, I'll go…
Ugh, that would make a good song though. Damn!
credits
released March 18, 2019
Kaelin Halcrow, Gary Hughes
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